Going from good to bad is one thing, but starting at bad is another

The internet is home to numerous things, good and bad. Recently, bands and artists have been getting popular over myspace. This in itself is not a bad thing, and a lot of good bands have been found this way. Still, the lack of quality in the bad artists is horrible. Though bad music is made all the time, it often goes un-noticed. However, this is not the case for The Millionaires.

After putting up a few tracks, the Millionaires became an overnight sensation. Upon listening to their "music" one may wonder why. Sure, it is a little catchy and is slowly getting better musically, but the lyrics are just unforgivable. Every song from "Alcohol" to "Just Got Paid, Let's Get Laid" screams senseless immaturity. This is a shame, because, as previously stated, the background music is progressively getting better.

Though, to take a glimpse into the world of the Millionaires, one song shall be chosen out of random, because each song is essetially the same. For fun we shall look at "Rated X-Mas." At first glance it seems like another song with some sexual references, specifically Christmas references. This is not a horrible concept, and can be a fun sort of song if done right. The problem is it is way to explicit, and not done right. It is possible to go on for quite some time about these lyrics, but this one verse may suffice:

I'm staring at the clock
Waiting for my santa cock
In an out my chimney
Cause he's been around the block

Just where to begin? Apparently Santa is, for lack of a better word, a player who sleeps around a lot. So, now you are probably thinking it cannot get worse, and if it is just this it is acceptable, well guess again:

As I'm licking on his peppermint
I'm gentle with his ornaments
Icing on my lips
Now it's time to open my present

Yes, this is real, and they are signed to a legit record label. Somehow it is possible to get signed when writing songs about, well Christmas porn. Though, these lyrics are to be expected with the pre-chorus that goes something like this:

I'll make you skeet like snow
As i take off my clothes

As any sane, thinking person can tell, these lyrics are just atrocious. Needless to say, there is no point in listening to this group. Though I have never tried it I cannot imagine the songs being any better while being under the influence, especially since their voices are ear piercingly screechy. When all is said and done I will not tell you I told you so, but if you listen to them remember you read this blog as your warning.